Thursday, November 15, 2012

Finally... the Cancer Free Boo-Bee Day!


Hello Friends and Family! 
I’m back and can happily report I DO NOT have cancer ANYMORE.  Dr. BK confirmed the final pathology reported the lymph node dissection indicated the cancer had not spread!  Yep, you heard that right, with the help of many medical professionals (even Dr. Shorty Pants), lots of people praying for me and the beautiful Grace from God, together we totally kicked this cancer’s bootaay!  So take THAT Mr. C and the horse you rode up on!  So here is what went down on my Cancer Free Boo-Bee Day….
The morning of the big day I am reviewing the “pre-surgery rules” just to make sure I am compliant.   Unlike some people in my family, I love rules, reading directions and doing exactly what they say.  But I came across a few “do-not’s” that seemed a little preposterous.  Like, why can’t I have any makeup, hair gel, hairspray, nail polish or acrylic nails in the operating room?    What are they going to hurt?  So after much deliberation, I decided to leave the makeup off, but conveniently “forget” the rest of the cosmetic rules and figured I could beg for forgiveness if I should get busted.  After all, how could I ruin my French manicure and special toenail design my friend, Linn had worked so hard on a couple days earlier?  
We arrived at MD Anderson Main Hospital at 6:00 AM to check into the surgical holding area which felt like a deep freezer.  I was feeling very nervous, nauseous and cold!   When we walked up, I was amazed there were a mob of people waiting, along with their numerous family members (even though the directions clearly stated only ONE family member per patient was allowed).
So finally someone sounding official told everyone to stand up and follow the lead person through the double doors at the end of the hall.  So hundreds of people stood up and were herded down the hallway to be assigned a surgical stall.  Apparently, my Romeo found this method of assignment very comical.  As we began walking behind the crowd, my ONE family member began “mooing.”   Of course, I started laughing (along with many others around us) which thankfully broke the tension in the air for a few minutes.  Seriously, how does this man know when he needs to make me laugh, when I feel like crying?
Okay, so let’s fast forward through the next hour… a couple of nurses hook me up to all kinds of  monitors, stuck the IV in my arm and told me they will be back in a few minutes.  In the meantime, my Daddy showed up (hooray I have TWO family members now), Dr. Sarah came by to say hello and preview Dr. BK’s artwork on my chest (which Romeo happily colored in the night before) and finally I met Dr. Jasmine. 
Her name is not really Dr. Jasmine but she reminds me of the beautiful Disney Princess from Aladdin. Plus, she has a last name that I would not even attempt to pronounce, but she appears to be of Middle Eastern descent.  Anyway, she introduced herself and explained she will be assisting Dr. BK in my reconstruction.  What?  The Boobie King needs help?  Before I can question her another nurse came into the room and squirted something in my IV to relax me because they are about to take me in.  Hello, do I look nervous?
I really don’t remember anything after that but my Romeo says the pre-surgical cocktail relaxed me to the point I was willing to flash anyone who wanted to see Dr. BK’s artwork on my cancer parts.  I just want to publicly say I totally deny this allegation and believe I remained lady-like through the entire event (especially since my Dad was present and he spent all that money on Charm School when I was a teenager.)
Anyway, about twelve hours later, I wake up in the recovery room and a nurse that looks like a Barbie Doll is sitting beside me waiting for me to open my eyes.  The first thing I ask her is if my lymph nodes were clear.  She immediately told me I will need to ask my family about “this” information.  Oh no!! I want to scream and beg her to please tell me, but instead I close my eyes believing cancer probably has spread to my lymph nodes, and start mentally planning how I am going to survive chemo and losing all my hair. 
That’s all for tonight, but stay tuned, I’ve got a lot more to share about my Cancer Free Boo-Bee Day because you need to know Nurse Barbie Doll totally led me astray.

1 comment:

  1. Hooray!! and PTL!! You are a pistol, a trooper, a survivor, and a wonderful rep and inspiration for all women. Tell Romeo I laughed out loud and I can just picture his antics!!! And even though I knew you were a flasher at heart, I don't believe it. Surely the happy shot did not void charm school 30 years ago!! I love you so much, and I am so proud of you. You are astounding, amazing, awesome.. THE BOMB!! Love you, KK Oh and PS. Just for your info, I followed ALL my presurgery rules, so I have NO idea who you are talking about!! :)

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